Rebecca Ryan Speaking at Chamber Dinner

Rebecca Ryan was the featured speaker at the Hutchinson/Reno County Chamber annual dinner tonight.

Ryan is the author of "Live First, Work Second," which gives insight into the mindset of the next generation. She has researched the material through interviews and focus groups. She has her own firm called Next Generation Consulting that aims to help communities attract and keep people of all ages.

I just reread the book and it's a quick, concise read - well worth the effort. For the purposes of discussion, the generations are roughly divided into:
Silent Generation born 1925-1942
Baby Boomers born 1943-1960
Generation X born 1961-1981
Millennials born 1982-2002

In her initial comments this evening, Ryan told the group that a "Leader's job today is not to have the answer. A leader's job today is to midwife the answer." She told people to consider if when they go to meetings they pretty much know what is going to happen. If so there's not enough new voice in the meeting.

I've never thought of it that way, but she summed up why I generally hate meetings - we have the same conversations over and over again. I can anticipate what's going to be said next, which means there's no reason for me to be there. But I think for some people, they see value in that because meetings are a way for them to "hammer home" their point of view by repeating it. I just don't want to be involved. But, then, of course, I'm one of those Gen X people who has no patience with such things. We like things to move quickly. So, there you go.

I knew I would like Ryan when I read the book and she brought up Maslow. If you've read here for any amount of time, you know I'm a big fan. I really think Maslow had us all figured out. She looks at it from a generational perspective - the greatest generation wanted basic needs, the boomers moved up to affiliation, the gen xers value independence and the millennials are working their way up to the top into self-actualization.

A real shift is that people used to have one job their whole lives. I was on my 7th job before I was 40 and I felt like I'd stayed in some of those for a long time. She said in the coming generation, that by age 32 people will have had nine jobs. I think it's great to do different things - you move in different circles, meet different people, learn different systems - and take all of that with you into the next thing, making life a richer experience. Ryan said younger people "know they will have multiple jobs, but they may not necessarily want to have multiple homes or zip codes."

She discussed the seven indexes she lays out in the book. These are the things that matter to young people when they're considering moving into a community.
Vitality - health and well being of a community - are there trails for example
Earning - can I make a living here and are there knowledge-based jobs. The 30% of people engaged in knowledge based jobs make more than half of the income in the US. If you want to raise the standard of living for everyone in your community, you need to increase your knowledge-based jobs and entrepreneurs
Learning - not just traditional learning, but are their writer's groups and lectures and other ways to keep the brain engaged
Different Talent - does the community incorporate all different kinds of talent? She uses the Irish Potato famine as an example to illustrate this - the famine happened because they had no genetic diversity in the potato. She asked the group tonight, "Are you growing only one kind of potato here?"
Cost of Lifestyle - can I afford to have a life here
After Hours - what is there to do after work and on weekends - this may not necessarily mean a big party scene - not everyone wants that
Around Town - How easy is it to get around. The national average commute is 22.6 minutes. We can get from one end of Hutchinson to the other in that amount of time and that is something I like about living here. I do not ever again want to spend my time sitting in traffic.

She talked a bit about networks - what kind of opportunities are there for people to connect. You know this is one of my great concerns - how we connect with other humans. This seems very lacking in our world today and we are less for it. She challenged us to think about how we create a space to connect.



A really important point she made was that if you have people talking about ways to improve a community, it doesn't mean that what's there is bad. It just means there's a new way to look at things.

One of my favorite comments was, "I don't care if you put young people or young thinkers at the table." I've noticed lately that regardless of the topic, the answer often seems to be age related. We hear, "Well, we need to get young people involved..." or "Well, people over 40 don't do this..."  This can be used to explain everything from texting to newspaper readership.

The problem is, these things are far deeper than age and if you stop with an explanation of age, then there's nothing that can be done. We can't create more people under 40. But, of course, age is not the answer. I'm closer to 50 than 40 and text more than some people I know who are half my age. It's not age and if you explain everything away with age you don't ever get to a real answer that you can actually use.

Overall it was a very interesting evening. I'm so glad I went. Trish came and picked me up and it was good to be there. I ran into a lot of folks I know. Everyone seemed amazed to see me out and about. Tomorrow is two weeks since surgery. I think I'm doing pretty well, but I will be glad to be normal again. At least now I have some new things to think about while I'm recuperating.
________________
Check www.patsyterrell.com for the blog, art, and more. Friend me on facebook.com. Follow me at twitter.com.

We'll See One Time

The other night we were talking about how you say "no" to people. I'm a big proponent of being direct. I'd much rather people tell me "no" instead of telling me "not right now, but maybe later" or something less definitive. Just tell me the truth. And if the truth is "no" just deliver it unvarnished.

I used to run into this problem all the time when setting up gardens for the garden tour. I would call someone and ask and they would say, "Oh, I can't do it this year, but call me next year." The following year I would call and they would say, "Oh, not this year, but next year for sure so call me then." After the third time I hear this I just say to people, very politely, "Do you just not want to do this. If you don't, please just tell me. I only keep calling you because you tell me to call you again. If you'll just tell me 'no' if that's what you mean then I will stop calling you. It will be easier for both of us." Even then some people just can't say "no." They're wasting my time and they're causing me to waste their time. Lets just stop it.

We were talking about this in the context of different cultures and Sharon mentioned that in Amish culture they often do not want to say "no" so they say, "We'll see one time." For some reason I just love this phrase. I'm going to work this into my daily life somehow. It's just too beautiful to not use.

How will I work it in? I don't know.

We'll see one time.
________________
Check www.patsyterrell.com for the blog, art, and more. Friend me on facebook.com. Follow me at twitter.com. All text and photos on this website are copyright Patsy Terrell, unless otherwise noted. None are to be used without permission. Thank you.

I swore I would never do it...

I swore I would never go out of the house in pajamas, but I did. The shame.

I've grown so weary of seeing people at restaurants and stores wearing their pajama bottoms. I get that they're comfy, but it's just so tacky. There has never been much danger that I would follow suit because I didn't own any pajamas.

Then I ordered a pair of "lounging pants" for my recuperation. "Lounging pants" is just another way of saying "pajamas." We all know it. There's no point in denying it. It's just marketing.

Well, they're cute - a pink/green/claret plaid - and very comfy. I've used them to lounge in and sleep in and I had them on yesterday morning when Greg roused up from the couch in the other room and said a few minutes later, "Patsy, there's something wrong with both my eyes. I can't see - everything is like I'm looking through a film." Needless to say, this got me out of bed very quickly. We couldn't see anything wrong, but I called the eye doctor's office that was open for another 25 minutes and they said they would see him.

"I can't drive," he said.

"I will," I said.

"You can't."

"I can," I said with tremendous conviction. It's only a few blocks and I knew I would be able to manage it fine. Which I did. In my pajamas. Yes, the pajamas/lounging pants, pink plaid and all.

There was no time to change clothes or call someone to come and take us. We just went. I wouldn't want to drive more than a few blocks because the way I have to sit in the seat is uncomfortable, but it was fine and I felt my reflexes were fine. I hadn't had any pain pills in about 22 hours.

Greg's eye problem was diagnosed as an infection, so nothing serious - part of a sinus infection he has. The doctor gave him a prescription for some drops. We took it to Dillon's to get it filled because it was on the way home and the optometrist suggested them. I won't ever make that mistake again. Good grief.

First they tell us it will take two hours to fill it. We give them about four hours and come back. They can't find anything, including the actual prescription. After some fumbling around they tell us they don't have this medicine and offer to call around and look for it. They had had four freaking hours to call around and hadn't bothered. Now that we're sitting in the drive through lane, with three cars behind us, they want to call around. There's some customer service. Greg, smartly, just took the prescription back and took it to Walmart where they actually keep medication on hand with which to fill prescriptions - a concept other pharmacies might want to consider.

By the way, this would be a fine example of why I shop at Walmart, which always seems to mystify people. They have the products you want/need on the shelves. That's a big one. And when it comes to prescriptions they charge me $4 for one that another pharmacy charges $53 for. I simply can't afford to give my local businesses an extra $49 a month for the same product. Sorry. If you can justify it and afford it, that's fabulous. I can't.

I had actually been considering moving my prescriptions to Dillon's since I shop there anyway, but yesterday's experience told me that would be a foolish, foolish, foolish move. I thought Walmart was slow when they wanted thirty minutes to fill a prescription. Little did I know they were four times faster than Dillon's. Not to mention they can actually fill the prescription.

I do love Dillon's for grocery shopping, especially when I have coupons. They give double coupons and that keeps me coming back. Have I ever mentioned my love of coupons? They're also convenient to run to when I need just a few things.

Well, back to the pajamas and my secret shame that is no longer secret. I'll just say that once you've crossed the line there's no going back. I wore them to lunch. I wore them to dinner. I slept in them. I'm still in them. It's disgraceful.

I could plead that changing clothes is a struggle for me because of the bending. I could point out that it's not like I'm getting anything very dirty. I could say I'm allowed because I'm still recuperating. But, of course, these are all just ugly excuses that lead to people like me running around in public in clothes never designed to be seen outside the confines of one's home.

Obviously, I need to order a couple more pair. At least a couple more. Because once the line has been crossed there's no going back. I've gone over to the dark side. Or the pink plaid side.
________________
Check www.patsyterrell.com for the blog, art, and more. Friend me on facebook.com. Follow me at twitter.com.

Emotions

I'm a very emotional person, although I like to think that I can control myself pretty well when it's necessary. For example, if someone around me needs emergency medical care I'm very calm about getting what they need. Then, once the danger has passed and they're being cared for, I become a blubbering mass. Being a blubbering mass, of course, is of no use to anyone for anything. But, it is sometimes very cathartic to the blubber-er.

The last few days I've been really emotional. Not necessarily over anything in particular, just in general. When I lay down at night I'm prone to be crying for reasons I can't even determine. I'm not sure if it's relief over the diagnosis after a few weeks of stress, worry over paying my medical bills, emotion over the loss of my body parts or just general malaise that I don't feel normal. I know I'm very bad at being sick, and I think the latter is one that is having a dramatic impact on me, although it's far less significant than the others you would think.

Today I had a little talk with myself that I need to stop this foolishness. I just got some of the best news of my life - it's benign - news thousands of people a day are praying for. I need to let go of this other stuff and be nothing but grateful. I hope I'm successful in this moving on endeavor.

I am so incredibly grateful to have a diagnosis of benign. I just need to manifest that gratitude in new ways.
________________
Check www.patsyterrell.com for the blog, art, and more. Friend me on facebook.com. Follow me at twitter.com.

Blogs to Read

There are a few blogs I read on a regular basis and I'm struck by how much really good writing there is online. I'm also amazed by the lives people can create for themselves. That glimpse into people's lives is what attracts me to a blog.

When people are open about themselves, I'm attracted to read what they have to say. Is that because it's human nature? Or is it because we're lacking this in our real lives so we seek it in this new fashion? Probably a bit of both.

I'm curious what other blogs you read. Leave a comment or email me at patsyterrell@gmail.com to let me know. I'm always looking to see what else is out there that might be of interest.

The health report for the day is that I've been up most of the day, but cannot function well enough to really accomplish anything. Greg, Steve and I went to Roy's for lunch. Thanks for lunch, Anne! I can play on the computer, do facebook, and read blogs, but actually doing anything that requires logical thought is beyond me. I'm sure that's partially the drugs. Of course, it was a month ago today that all of this began. I went for the pelvic sonogram on Jan. 6. A lot has happened since then.

Send me your blog favorites!
________________
Check www.patsyterrell.com for the blog, art, and more. Friend me on facebook.com. Follow me at twitter.com. All text and photos on this website are copyright Patsy Terrell, unless otherwise noted. None are to be used without permission. Thank you.

First Big Outting

Tonight I had my first big outting since coming home - a trip to Skaets. Yes, I know, I'm living on the edge. I wasn't up to my usual moon burger, but a grilled cheese with pickles hit the spot.

Greg's brother, Steve, is visiting and he wanted to hit Skaets so we headed up there. Sharon met us there and we had a nice visit. Then we all came back to my house and munched on those strawberries Todd and Tara sent.



Steve is a funny guy. He's also a very talented writer and film producer. I'm so flattered that Steve reads this blog, at least in part. He tells me he skips the posts on doilies and such. Who knows what pithy wisdom he's missing, but what are you gonna do?

I've been up almost all day today and I've started weaning myself from the pain pills. I've been taking the pain pills every couple of hours, so I wouldn't be in any pain. But, I slept through doses a few times and realized there was no pain. So, I think I've reached the point where I need them less.

I'm not going to be in pain, but I have an addictive personality and I do not need to be taking pills "just in case" I might be in pain. So, I'm being cautious with them. Although, frankly, I cannot imagine what sort of recreational purpose these things serve. They pretty much just make me sleepy, which I don't find all that thrilling.

I've been up almost all day today. I can't say I'm accomplishing much in those hours, as I'm just not thinking very clearly, but the mere fact that I can be up and about is encouraging to me. They tell me I did myself a world of good walking a lot in the hospital, so I'm continuing that at home, even though I don't have a nice long hallway to use. I make a circle through my hallway, living room and dining room until I start to get a little dizzy.



I spoke with the PR person at the hospital today, who found my blog and read about my experiences there. She seems very on top of things and has an interesting idea she's asked us to participate in. She was very impressed with Greg's pictures. I think we'll be able to work something out. I'd love to be able to help recognize the folks who were so helpful to me.

I'm feeling better each day and I'm optimistic I'll be up to seeing Rebecca Ryan at the Chamber Dinner on Monday night. I'm going to have to ask around to see if someone can pick me up since I don't think I'll be driving by then and Greg will be out of town.

The deal with driving is that when I feel my reflex if someone pulled out in front of me would be to hit the brakes instead of grab my stomach, then I can drive. I'm not there yet. Maybe I will be by Monday. We'll see. I need a backup plan regardless.

Well, the big plans for tomorrow are - hopefully - a trip to Roy's and a shower. I know. My life is so darned exciting it's hard to keep track. We'll see if I'm able to accomplish both of those in one day. If something has to go, it will be Roy's. As much as I love Roy's, a shower is becoming an essential. Otherwise, no one is going to want to be around me, even if I have gourmet chocolate covered strawberries to share. And I'm a woman who can't put my own socks on, so I can't take the risk.
________________
Check www.patsyterrell.com for the blog, art, and more. Friend me on facebook.com. Follow me at twitter.com. All text and photos on this website are copyright Patsy Terrell, unless otherwise noted. None are to be used without permission. Thank you.

Surprises

The FedEx guy brings surprises sometimes. Today it was these - a dozen beautifully dipped chocolate covered strawberries from Todd and Tara in Kansas City. I was able to resist munching one long enough to take a photo.


________________
Check www.patsyterrell.com for the blog, art, and more. Friend me on facebook.com. Follow me at twitter.com. All text and photos on this website are copyright Patsy Terrell, unless otherwise noted. None are to be used without permission. Thank you.